is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
