I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
