you turned your livingroom into a bong?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
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