he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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