we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
