well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
