I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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