Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
