Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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