saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
