I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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