Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
