Kiss
Puke
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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