The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize