dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
