I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
