i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Your cock deserves a montage
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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