There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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