is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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