Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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