dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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