Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Randomize
