shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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