all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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