Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
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