**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize