the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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