is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize