I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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