i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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