I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.