I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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