so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
