Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
My liver just had a heart attack.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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