Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
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Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize