I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Is it because I queefed?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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