Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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