i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I look better un-naked...
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
