If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
