Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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