Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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