What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize