I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize