Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize