You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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