Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
