actually, I'm a sock model
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
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