called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
