She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I'm too high and old for this...
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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