sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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