So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
